Funk

Funk, population 1.  The place I find myself unmotivated in life, disappointed by most and sad on one of my most favorite Hallmark holidays.  I’m not sure where this place is located, who drove me here or why I was dropped off without a survival kit, but nonetheless here I sit.  So how do you get to this dreadful place of Funk?Well, this is the fun part where I like to play ‘blame game’, but I will find that this does not get me out. Bonus, I just end up hurting those around me.  I feel like we all get dropped off at town Funk during different seasons of life.  Sometimes its a quick trip for the day, other times it feels like that never ending vacation that lasts weeks.  I am currently on day 4 of living here and I must say it’s dreary.  Today’s overcast and cold mist seems to fit into it perfectly.  I so badly crave the warmth of the sun and fresh air on my face.  I am starting to discover some new things about myself while I sit on this deserted island.  I am feeling depleted.  Depleted in energy, zest and love.  Just depleted.  I feel like I am giving more than I am receiving.  Not to say I am not being loved on, between my husband (who is doing his very best), 3 children that love me immensely and some amazing girlfriends…. I AM feeling the love.  It’s more of what I am not receiving internally, spiritually.  How do I fix this?  I need help.  Well, since I am currently located in Funk, I don’t have these answers, but I am going to walk through my ideas and see if my fingers and this keyboard can come up with a plan, a road map if you will.

So first, what am I reading, filling my soul  up with, filling my head with?  Currently I am reading a very good, but slightly depressive book….so I think I will start there.  I know in the past when I read (which is always first thing in the morning with my coffee) it sets the tone for my day.  So reading things that fill me with His truth, love and inspiration are a must for me.  So change my current book, okay check (well I should say finish it, there’s only 2 chapters left and she’s finally gotten to the good part).  Second, what is taking the most of me?  Well most of it is the duties, roles and obligations that I have set up for myself.  So as a grown adult, which totally sucks sometimes, I do need to finish what I started and follow through with my commitments.  This is also an opportunity for me to take a step back, see what breaths passion into my soul and what breaths ‘work’? So step two, finish my current roles and then pass them on to the next.  I feel like when we do work out of obligation, we can become a bad seed in the pot,  this can then spread, poisoning the rest of your crop.  You never know when you giving up a role can open a door for someone else who may desperately need it and even shine at it.  So shine on sisters!!! I will pass the baton.  Lastly, where is my ‘me’ time?  And this does not include bathroom breaks (alone), showers (without a 2 year old asking you what you are doing in there) or trips to the grocery store solo.  This means time that you enjoy, doing things for and with yourself.  For me this is reading in my favorite chair, walking around Target or Hobby Lobby (with no intention to actually buy) but just browsing the aisles for inspiration and pretending like I can buy it ( I totally can’t, have you read my last post on budget’s?! But the pretending part is fun).  So that’s it, instead of carving out time for another playdate, another leadership meeting, another ‘work’ project, I will carve out time for me.  Just me.

Okay, so this is what I’ve come up with so far…read something that inspires and fuels my soul, finish my current roles and pass them on and find some ‘me’ time.  Sounds easy enough.  Although, here I am, still located in Funk?  Well friends, this is where I guess the ‘work’ comes in.  Saying we are going to do something and actually doing it are two very different things.  It’s like finding perspective.  I know it’s there, it’s just a lot of times I pass right by it, as I head to town Funk.  It’s time for me to make a u-turn, head back to Perspective, stop at Intentionality, pray in Hope and there I will find my final destination, Freedom.  Population, me.

We are worth the work ladies.  We do so much for so many and often we forget to do for ourselves.  This is not selfish, this is survival.  Ever hear the lady over the speaker before your flight takes off say “put the oxygen mask on yourself before others”? How much life, love and hope can we breath into this world if we are gasping for air?  We need to breath in what makes us happy, makes us whole, makes us, us.  No one will hate you, everyone will forgive you and you will love you.

Where do you feel the most understood?  What sparks a fire in your soul?  What brings you joy?  What gives you calm? peace? comfort?  Find these things and own them.  Make them  a part of your every day.  Fuel yourself for this journey sister friends.

We are all in this together.  No one is alone.  There is hope for every one of us that are willing to do the work to find it and pray the prayer to receive it.  No more soap boxes, no more eating our feelings (which actually sounds nice right now as I stare at all this Valentine’s chocolate), no more blaming others for where we are.

Today is for you.  Today is for me.  So lets pull up our bootstraps, stick out our thumb and get the heck out of Funk….I for one am O.V.E.R. I.T.!

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11: 28-30)

Xoxo,

Melanie

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