Trusting God to guide your ship means tossing the map overboard and strapping on your life vest.
As much as this here planner would love to confirm Gods constant affirmation and itinerary of our next well thought out step, I’d be lieing to put it simply.
When was the last time you were conflicted with your next step and prayed for guidance…then…wait for it….listened?
Mine was in a transitional season of life. I had prayed diligently for God to show me my next step, only to be led to a place of employment that would go on to hurt me deeper than my heart had ever been hurt.
Had I gotten this all wrong?! How did I misread all those signs and gut feelings?! Well, that old saying, “hindsite is 20/20”, wasn’t to shame the blind…it was to remind us that we can’t always see the masterpiece in the mud.
Finding myself in a season of loss, brokenness, hurt feelings and betrayal…I did what I do best and prayed. I waited. Looking back now, I see Gods work through it all. I see that going to work in that specific space, served me for a short time in a season that was going to be my most difficult to date. That He was conditioning me for the heartache to come and needed my heart to be healthy, to withstand a season of suffering.
He would eventually deliver me out of that toxic environment by offering my husband a job that paid both our incomes during that time, something I saw as unattainable and to be honest…a full blown miracle. He would then whisper dreams in my ear that I had packed away years ago, but say…trust me. As I put up obstacles and reasons as to why it wouldn’t work, we would remove them to the point that even I could not deny it.
This would place me into a scary season of going back to school with 3 children under the age of 5, completing 17 hours in my first semester, with a 6 month old nursing in my arms. Let’s just say Jesus took the wheel that semester because I never attempted that again. But it was cool to say I did it, if even only once.
Now 3.5 years later and 1 semester away from graduating, I know God was guiding my sails. That He knew all along His plan but I had to be obedient to trust it. Even when it made no sense. Even when I was tired. Even when I was scared and unsure of the end result.
I’m still very much in this story because I’m still alive. I don’t believe I will fully understand my current circumstance until I hit that 20/20 mark, which will likely be several years from now. But I do know that I can trust Him. I do know that He will use all of it for His good. If He could deliver me from, literally, the most devastating season of my life and gift me a purpose beyond my wildest dreams, then I know He is doing the same for you.
If there is breath in your lungs and a beat to your heart, He is not done. He has not given up on you.
Trust Him. Ask Him. And patiently wait for Him to show you, guide you. It’s not for us to understand in the moment but He will illuminate His grace at just the right time.
“But you, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high. I call out to the Lord, and he answers me from his holy mountain. I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me. I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side.
From the Lord comes deliverance. May your blessing be on your people.”
Psalm 3:3-6, 8 NIV